Suri Cruise will Rule the World

Xanthos, Tom Cruise or whatever his alien soul on Earth is called has been controlling everything that happens with little Suri Cruise since day one. I don't think Nicole Kidman would let him do that with the other kids, so he replaced her with the younger Katie Holmes who he could brainwash. Score one for the aliens.

Us Weekly has learned that while Suri -- who as a baby was breastfed and nursed on a mixture of barley water, milk and corn syrup which Hubbard advocated as being healthier than formula and breast milk -- is too young to take classes at the Scientology Centre, the 18-month-old is constantly surrounded by believers, including her two nannies.

“Tom doesn’t like associating with people who aren’t Scientologists,” says an insider.

Additionally, Holmes, 28, and Cruise, 45, have a hard time saying no to Suri. But it’s not simply because they’re pushovers.

“It’s all about being positive and supportive,” says the couple’s friend (Hubbard advised parents to “try to be the child’s friend.”) As for discipline, one former church member tells Us that Scientologists do not scold their children, but instead explain that bad behavior (like throwing a toy) is the “wrong action.” (A Scientology rep tells Us, “How a parent disciplines their child is left up to the parent.”)

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That little girl will probably grow up and one day and rule the whole planet from a giant golden throne. She'll enslave most of what is now Australia just as a payback to Nicole Kidman from her "daddy."

We also know Tom likes to preach what is the "wrong action" don't we? Remember how he lectured Matt Lauer about the use of depression drugs that Brooke Shields was taking? How about him lecturing the guy that squirted him in the face with water? Watch that video after the jump in case you forgot.

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