I just spent the last little while laughing my ass off and figured since it's Friday, I should share with all of you. If there's one 'ting I could say, it's that I really wish they made superhero underoos in my size. If there's a second 'ting...it's that Keith Malley is one funny MoFo. I don't mean like funny ha ha either. I mean funny HA HA!

Normally you'd have to go get a money order and send it off hoping to get your goods in the mail, but not this time! Thankfully someone invented a little something called the Internet and some other four-eyed guys invented the iPod. Now you just follow my linky underneath and go download his albums using the power God intended us to have. After all, it's why He created streaming porn movies. Quit reading this and go get some laughs already!

Keith Malley on iTunes

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Prince Harry forced to come home (The Superficial)

Danielle Lloyd looks squishy (Derek Hail)

Jessica Simpson is pretty without makeup (I'm Not Obssessed)

Cameron Diaz has nice nipples (IDLYITW)

Rihanna is red hot in leather (Egotastic)

Paris Hilton is a skinny skank (DListed)

Justin Timberlake's package in a speedo (Just Jared)

Cheryl Tweedy almost see-thru (HollywoodTuna)

Natalie Portman is sexy during late night (CityRag)

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What has two thumbs and likes blowjobs? THIS guy!

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Sexy actress Kate Beckinsale did an interview with Allure magazine this month where she talks about when she left her boyfriend  Michael Sheen for director Len Weisman. Not only that, she talks about her precious treasure...her vagina.

"I was called a slut when I split up with Michael and began seeing Len, but I've only ever had about three boyfriends. Only a handful of people have seen into the Pharaoh's Tomb!"

The star also insisted her best asset is too "private" to discuss.

She said: "My best feature is unfortunately a private matter, although I'm told it is spectacular. But you can't really walk it down the red carpet. What can I say?"

Source

Wait, is it the "Pharaoh's Tomb" because it's a treasured and sacred place or because it's all old and dusty with corpses in it? I guess if it's spectacular, it's got to be the first one. I think she should walk it down the red carpet if it's so great. Dress it all up, give a haircut and then take it out to meet the world. Why not?

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Last night four more contestants were voted off American Idol dropping the number to 16. Next week they whittle things down to the Top 12. I really didn't have any surprises this week and nobody I voted for was cut.

Alexandrea Lushington and Alaina Whitaker

Robbie Carrico and Jason Yeager

I still don't have a strong take on the girls this year. I have a few favorites with Brooke White being the top of the list so far, but I like Carly Smithson and Asia'h Epperson a lot too. With the guys, my top three are Michael Johns, David Cook, and David Archuleta. David Hernandez is also a favorite and I'm still not counting Chikezie out. He threw down this week! Who's your favorites?

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Lindsay Lohan is supposedly considering posing nude in the pages of Playboy. Rather than just being herself though, she's supposedly considering impersonating Marilyn Monroe again because of all the publicity it's gotten.

THE PROS and cons on Lindsay Lohan appearing as Marilyn Monroe for New York mag continue apace. The publication has all but imploded. Their Web site collapsed under constant hits!

Now we hear Lindsay is tempted to continue her nude homage to MM. Playboy's Hugh Hefner has offered the young star the chance to re-create Marilyn's famed nude swim from the unfinished film "Something's Got To Give."

Source

Playboy is just so tame that I'm not even going to be impressed if she actually does it. Sure, the Hef might be asking her to get naked and then she does...big deal. Lindsay takes her clothes off for a lot of guys. I don't even think she really cares about paying some kind of tribute to Marilyn Monroe either. She just likes getting naked and wants to do it in a way that people can't call her a whore.

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