Run, Heather, Run… oh wait.
Monday, January 26, 2009
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In today’s NY Post, Heather Mills said she’s being chased by men around the city. There are some celebrities you can just take jabs at because they deserve it and are sitting on $50 million divorce settlements, so here goes.
Exactly how slow must these guys be to not be able to overtake a one-legged woman? I keep on picturing poor Heather (above) in Night of the Living Dead where the zombies move at .5 mph.
She also has really sexy girlfriends who never get asked out. If I saw a woman with that much money and no chance of escape from across the room, I’d tackle her. What’s she gonna do – kick me in the balls? Her stint on Dancing with the Stars proved me wrong though and I must say I was one of the secret society that watched only waiting, praying, that her fake leg flew off in the middle of the flamenco.
Ok it’s wrong to make fun of the handicapped, or physically challenged, but for fifty million dollars I would chew my own leg off and just hire people to carry me around.
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