Another News Flash for you from the DUH! network.

Naomi Campbell was arrested AGAIN. This time, a woman has claimed Campbell attacked her. Hmmmm, how odd that this is like the 3rd time she's been arrested due to some anger/hitting related charge. Soon she'll be on Oprah again saying it's all a mistake.

The Sun newspaper reported the woman who filed the complaint was Campbell's drug counselor and that the therapist said she was "scratched all over her face" by the hot-tempered model.

Campbell's spokesman said there had been a misunderstanding.

Yeah, a misunderstanding. The drug counselor probably said something like stop being a junkie and then Naomi when all cat-scratch fever on her. It was a misunderstanding. Right.

NY Daily News - Slap Naomi with new assault charge

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Can you believe that? I am still in shock over the whole thing. Who would have thought that Willie Nelson would be involved in possession of narcotic mushrooms and marijuana? Unbelievable.

LAFAYETTE, Louisiana (AP) -- Willie Nelson and four others were issued misdemeanor citations for possession of narcotic mushrooms and marijuana after a traffic stop Monday morning on a Louisiana highway, state police said.

The citations were issued after a commercial vehicle inspection of the country music star's tour bus, state police said in a news release.

"When the door was opened and the trooper began to speak to the driver, he smelled the strong odor of marijuana," the news release said.

I'm just too stunned for words.

CNN - Willie Nelson cited for pot, mushrooms

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Well, it seems not long after the report of the Lindsay Lohan getting a handbag full of jewlery stolen in Heathrow airport, someone turned in the missing bag. Said to contain one million dollars in items, the bag has now been give back and all is well.

"A member of the public contacted us to say they had found it and brought it in," a Metropolitan Police spokeswoman said, on customary condition of anonymity. "We have not yet established what, if anything, is missing."

It does make you wonder though. If the bag was stolen is one thing. If she just went to the restroom to look at herself in the mirror and simply forgot the thing is something else. I'm thinking she just left it somewhere. In the immortal words of my obnoxious neighbor kid..."smooth move Exlax!"

Yahoo News - Police recover Lindsay Lohan's handbag

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And my pinky finger WAS by my mouth for full effect.

In a stunning report it seems that Lindsay Lohan was a victim grand theft at Heathrow Airport. It seems she had her bright orange designer bag filled with about a million dollars worth of jewlery and that it included the new ring given to her by boyfriend Harry Morton.

The famous Scotland Yard had this to say to TMZ about the case:

"it is alleged that as the woman exited the Terminal One building, she noticed that an orange Hermes handbag was missing from her suitcase trolley." The bag, according to police, contained "a quantity of jewelry."

Lindsay's rep, Leslie Sloane, confirms to TMZ the theft occurred and that Lindsay is extremely upset about the loss of personal belongings. "She is begging for the return of the items," Sloane says. "She doesn't care how she gets them back, she just wants her stuff back."

TMZ.com - Lindsay Victim of Major Theft

Now it seems to me that in the movies, when you don't want your million dollars stolen, you put it in a brown paper sack and not a super-expensive designer bag. Not only that, but you keep your eye on the bag at all times. I think her security precautions are pretty terrible. In fact, just the other day...someone stole her underwear right off her (do your own web search for THOSE photos).

Now I don't want to bash her too hard because having stuff stolen sucks and I've been there myself. On the other hand, I don't think I would put so many valuables in a bag and then just leave them unattended while I played catch-up on my text messaging or whatever. People are strange.

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Yes, that's right. As hard to believe as it is, it seems Andy Dick was at the Comedy Central Roast of William *dramatic pause* Shatner. I simply can't believe that people are still suprised by this clown. He's like an annoying skin rash that won't go away. He just keeps coming back every time and then people are shocked at his behavior.

Holly-weird is too crazy.

August 15, 2006 -- KOOKY comedian Andy Dick went bonkers at the Comedy Central roast of William Shatner on Sunday night - licking the faces of Farrah Fawcett, Carrie Fisher and Patton Oswalt before biting Post reporter Mandy Stadtmiller on the hand during a bizarre backstage meltdown.

Dick's face-licking frenzy began after Oswalt made a crack about the scraggly star's rollerskate-licking turn in Jessica Simpson's video, "A Public Affair." Dick retaliated by unleashing his tongue on Oswalt's face before turning it on Fawcett, Fisher and "Star Trek" actress Nichelle Nichols during the taping at the Radford CBS Studio in Studio City, Calif.

Backstage at the after-party, a drunken Dick groped an appalled Stadtmiller, tried to kiss her, proclaimed his love for her and finally bit her hand.

"Baby please," Dick repeated six times. "Put in something nice," he said after urinating in front of the horrified journalist in his dressing room and offering her cocaine.

"They're so mean," he ranted. "I'm not weird. Maybe I'm a little weird, they make me out to be a monster, I'm not a monster . . . I just want to have fun, baby please."

A little weird? A LITTLE? How about so freaking weird that you make Kevin Federline look like a good husband. How about so weird that you make recent Eddie Murphy movies seem good.

Let's review:
Face-licking - check
Acting stupid - check
Groping - check
Biting - check
Drugs - check
Urinating in front of others - check

Note to the world...if Andy Dick licks your face, then go see the doctor. STAT! Now just wait until the next sighting. He'll go somewhere and everyone will be all suprised again like "wow, he's so weird."

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Fresh from his role in Fast & the Furious 4: Anti-Semitic Drifting, Mel Gibson was on hand to sign autographs and take photos for the police.

This is the same guy that "owns Malibu" and has a personal relationship with a female officer named "sugar tits."

Now, you want to know where Mel gets this stuff? Remember THIS from a while back?

A week before the United States release of Mel Gibson's controversial movie, The Passion of the Christ, the filmmaker's father has repeated claims the Holocaust was exaggerated.

Hutton Gibson's comments, made in a telephone interview with New York radio talk show host Steve Feuerstein, come at an awkward time for the actor-director who has been trying to deflect criticism from Jewish groups that his film might inflame anti-Semitic sentiment.

In his interview on WSNR radio's Speak Your Piece, to be broadcast on Monday, Hutton Gibson, argued that many European Jews counted as death camp victims of the Nazi regime had in fact fled to countries like Australia and the United States.

AND

In a television interview with Diane Sawyer this week, Mel Gibson accused the Times of taking advantage of his father, and he warned Sawyer against broaching the subject again.

"He's my father. Gotta leave it alone Diane. Gotta leave it alone," Gibson said, while offering his own perspective on the Holocaust.

"Do I believe that there were concentration camps where defenceless and innocent Jews died cruelly under the Nazi regime? Of course I do; absolutely," he said. "It was an atrocity of monumental proportion."

During his lengthy radio interview, Hutton Gibson, 85, said Jews were out to create "one world religion and one world government" and outlined a conspiracy theory involving Jewish bankers, the US Federal Reserve and the Vatican, among others.

The Age - Mel Gibson's father says Holocaust exaggerated

Yeah, that's where it comes from. Mel...please get help.

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